When will the pain stop? When will I not think about the abuse everyday? When will I be able to not blame myself for what happened to her? When will I be able to let Jasmine go to a friends house without completely losing it? When will her bad memories go away? When will she not be triggered by certain sounds, words, smells, songs, movies, shows, sayings, clothing, gum, pictures, names, actions, games, toys etc? When will people finally "GET IT?" what we have been through? What we are still going through? What Jasmine has been through. What Jasmine remembers. What she has nightmares about. What my 8 year old daughter worries about and will always deal with. Why are some people shocked that we are still working through this? Why do certain people think its time to just "move on and let it go" SERIOUSLY!?! Unless you have walked in our shoes, in my daughters shoes, SHUT THE F@*K UP!!!!! This wont go away...ever. I mean, I am just starting to get to a point where I can talk about it without bursting into tears. My daughter will deal with this for the REST if her LIFE. When will people stop putting their foot in their mouth and not say things to me like "Wow, You never would guess that Jasmine was sexually abused, she doesnt act like it" Umm... WHAT!?! What does a sexual abuse survivor act like? Do they walk around in a labeled t-shirt? Do they carry a sign? Do they introduce themselves as a survivor? NO, they dont. Sometimes, I just cant wrap my mind around what people feel they can say...
I didnt have anything to really update about, but I just felt I needed to get this out...vent...I have been feeling very frustrated lately.
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